The Back Story

Randy Paush, in his "Last Lecture" said: my dad always taught me that when there’s an elephant in the room, introduce them. So here goes the back story. In November 2004, our lives changed forever. We discovered that Jennifer had Stage IV metastatic cancer, which originated from the lungs and traveled to her brain.

She (and we in that respect) were given between 4 to 6 months.

It hit us like the proverbial ton of bricks. Here was a woman who exercised religiously, who ate right and in all intents and purposes was fitter than most of us. Yes, she had history of cancer in her family. Yes, she smoked when she was younger. Yes, she had a stressful job. But NO, this was entirely unexpected.

Jennifer, the world-class fighter she was decided to take on the cancer and FIGHT! So we did. We fought so very hard, exploring all types of therapy, researching like crazy all sorts of cures and praying incessantly. Jennifer underwent 3 surgeries (including cutting-edge gamma knife surgery), countless hours of chemo and all natures of alternative meds. We kept at it.

She outlived her prognosis by a year, often in excruciating pain in her last months. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to live through, and till this day, remains the most extraordinary experience in my life.

Jennifer passed in March 2006 when the morphine no longer helped, when her other organs were "invaded" as well. She never gave up though. Even to the very end, she held on to the hope for a cure, whilst accepting that the ultimate healing might be death. She felt her son needed her. She felt I needed her. She was worried for her aging mum. She wanted to see her younger sister married and "taken care of". She had a full to-do list for others.

I began the book when she was initially diagnosed and now, some 3 years after her passing, am happy enough with what I have written to publish it.

Jennifer I believe lived exceedingly well. The book in part honours her memory, but more than that I hope the book will help others in their journey...