Thank you for stopping by!

I need your help to get “HELP! My wife has Cancer… A Practical Guide to Becoming the BEST Caregiver for Your Loved Ones with Cancer” published.


Please read on for why I have written this book, how you can help me get it published and complete details on the bank accounts for the contribution.

God bless!

Your kind words!

I have received so many e-mails, messages and calls these last few days since i posted this blog. I feel happy to be back in the thick of cancer activism. As some of you know, I founded an NGO for cancer advocacy which is now run by others.

I am so enthused about this book, mainly because it will provide first hand experience to a person who is acting as caregiver to a cancer survivor. I wish a book like this existed when I was going through it all!

Anyway, whilst a lot of excitement has been generated, sadly, there is no movement on the funds save for the RM25,000 I have banked in as my contribution and a RM100 contribution from someone (please do e-mail me so I can send you your LIVESTRONG wrist bracelet).

Perhaps it is a sign of the times we live in. Or maybe as a friend of mine said: you are too subtle in asking for money.

Whatever the case may be, here goes: please contribute money for me to get this book published and all the proceeds given to cancer charities. I am reluctant to work with traditional publishers (a few have approached me) because they do not share in our charitable visions, and the quantities are relatively small.

Once again I appeal to you to take a moment and please do give what you can to help. As mentioned in an earlier post, I will reward all contributors with either a LIVESTRONG wrist bracelet, an autographed copy of the book or Acknowledgements (if you so wish) depending on the level of contribution.

So friends, please reach into your pockets and give!

My thanks, God bless and may you all have a great weekend...

The Back Story

Randy Paush, in his "Last Lecture" said: my dad always taught me that when there’s an elephant in the room, introduce them. So here goes the back story. In November 2004, our lives changed forever. We discovered that Jennifer had Stage IV metastatic cancer, which originated from the lungs and traveled to her brain.

She (and we in that respect) were given between 4 to 6 months.

It hit us like the proverbial ton of bricks. Here was a woman who exercised religiously, who ate right and in all intents and purposes was fitter than most of us. Yes, she had history of cancer in her family. Yes, she smoked when she was younger. Yes, she had a stressful job. But NO, this was entirely unexpected.

Jennifer, the world-class fighter she was decided to take on the cancer and FIGHT! So we did. We fought so very hard, exploring all types of therapy, researching like crazy all sorts of cures and praying incessantly. Jennifer underwent 3 surgeries (including cutting-edge gamma knife surgery), countless hours of chemo and all natures of alternative meds. We kept at it.

She outlived her prognosis by a year, often in excruciating pain in her last months. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to live through, and till this day, remains the most extraordinary experience in my life.

Jennifer passed in March 2006 when the morphine no longer helped, when her other organs were "invaded" as well. She never gave up though. Even to the very end, she held on to the hope for a cure, whilst accepting that the ultimate healing might be death. She felt her son needed her. She felt I needed her. She was worried for her aging mum. She wanted to see her younger sister married and "taken care of". She had a full to-do list for others.

I began the book when she was initially diagnosed and now, some 3 years after her passing, am happy enough with what I have written to publish it.

Jennifer I believe lived exceedingly well. The book in part honours her memory, but more than that I hope the book will help others in their journey...

Come and share in my efforts to make a difference in the lives of cancer survivors and their caregivers!

Contribute and help get “HELP! My wife has Cancer… A Practical Guide to Becoming the BEST Caregiver for Your Loved Ones with Cancer” published.

When I set out to write a book on becoming the best caregiver one can possibly be to a loved one with cancer, my wife Jennifer was still with us. I was driven to write the book because I could not find any resource for caregivers like me -- that could answers my questions, give me support, help me cope with my pain and in short, provide an easy how-to guide to follow.

So I started writing, full of hope that it would help me in my journey as Jennifer’s caregiver. I started writing the book as a kind of journal, a “how-to” guide compiled from the notes I kept for every visit to the doctor, for every therapy she underwent. I had hoped it would be a wonderful gift to both Jennifer and myself when she went into remission, that I could publish it to help others like me.

But it was not to be. Jennifer left us.

Six months after she passed away, I took time off work and spent it caring for our son and writing. It was a form of self-prescribed therapy. The words were angry and bitter, full of pain and hurt. It was very therapeutic, but would not really have offered much help to anyone else. Perhaps the therapy was indeed only meant for me.

I put the entire project aside, and moved on to other forms of therapy (which I describe in the book).

Then I chanced upon “The Last Lecture” on YouTube. It was and still is, the most compelling video I’ve ever watched in my life. Randy Pausch inspired me to write this third version of the book that I now need your help to publish.

This book has been written to inspire caregivers of cancer patients, particularly if your loved one has terminal disease.
You may be reading this because you are a caregiver. Or you may be a cancer survivor. Or someone in your life has been touched with cancer – whatever the case may be – I am glad you are reading this.

I need your help, financially and in other ways, to see that this book gets published.

I have consulted my printers, and they tell me that the printing cost for each book is around RM15 (or US$4.30). I intend to have 5,000 copies printed, which will cost RM75,000 (US$21,500). I will fund RM25,000 of this amount, and I now need your help to cover the shortfall of RM50,000.

From the 5,000 copies I will make 2,000 copies freely available to the Oncology units in all the major government hospitals in Malaysia, and sell the rest for RM30 (US$8.50) each. The entire proceeds will be donated to LIVESTRONG, the Lance Armstrong Foundation who Jennifer, Michael Jr and I support and to local cancer charities. I hope to raise RM100,000 with this effort – the money will go along way to help, I am sure.

But more important than the money, is the message the book contains. This book has the potential to change lives – I know, because it changed mine.

The experience of being a caregiver to my late wife has made me realize my full potential as a human being. The experience helped me transcend physical love (Eros) and move to unconditional love (Agape).

I have had to look death in the eye and accept it.

I have had to let go of the most precious moments in my memory – the future we planned together and embrace the reality of life with her, just as she was. Making the most of the precious time we had left together.

I have had to live up to my end of the bargain when we made our matrimonial vows to each other: “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health” and kept it to the end, “till death do us part”.

I encourage you to take a moment now and think of the people in your lives whom this book could help. And then please help me get it published.

I have set-up two bank accounts for this purpose.

The first is a Maybank account primarily for my friends in Malaysia, the second is with HSBC so that contributors from outside of Malaysia can also send monies for this effort.

Here are the account details:

Maybank:
Account Name: Michael Gilbert Chan Hong Beng

Bank: Malayan Banking Berhad

Account Number: 114393016550

SWIFT Code: MBBEMYKL

HSBC:
Account Name: Michael Gilbert Chan Hong Beng
Bank: HSBC
Account Number: 359-256203-108
Bank Address: KL, Malaysia
SWIFT Code: HBMBMYKL

Please do give what you can, as they say, no amount is too little.

As an added incentive, I will send anyone who contributes RM100 (US$28.50) or more a yellow LIVESTRONG wristband. For contributors of RM500 (US$143) or more, I will send you an autographed copy of the book once it is published. Contributors of RM1,000 (US$285) or more will be acknowledged in the Acknowledgements section of the book (please let me know if you want your contributions to be anonymous).

So my friends please spread the word for me. I will post on my blog and FB page once the RM75,000 has been reached as I do not need more than that.

If you feel the need to reach out to me, please drop me a note at mc@vinebranches.org. I read every e-mail and will respond as necessary so please do write to me. If I can help make your role as caregiver that much easier and that much better I will.